


Single Crystalline Tear

by zellieh



Category: The Avengers (2012), The Avengers - Ambiguous Fandom
Genre: Action/Adventure, BAMF Nick Fury, Banter, Bets, Captivity, Cliche, Cliche: subverted, Comedy, Crack, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, Gambling, Gen, Happy Ending, Hulk Smash, Humor, Interrogation, Nick Fury Knows All, Nick Fury Lies, Nick Fury Swears, Parody, Protective Hulk, Snark, Spies & Secret Agents, Team, Team Bonding, Team Dynamics, Woobie, Woobie: Nick Fury
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-04-10
Updated: 2013-04-10
Packaged: 2017-12-08 02:27:24
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 470
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/755923
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/zellieh/pseuds/zellieh
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Nick Fury looked down and cried a single, crystalline tear.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Single Crystalline Tear

**Author's Note:**

> This is a light-hearted comment-fic inspired by [a thread about woobie-Fury at FanficRants on LJ.](http://fanficrants.livejournal.com/11334419.html?thread=370084627#t370084627)

Fury bowed his head. "No, please...don't..." he murmured in a broken voice. "I'll do anything..." He looked down and cried a single, crystalline tear.

Loki laughed. "Pathetic worm! Did you really think that--"

Fury crouched lower and raised his hands defensively over his head...

...as the cell walls exploded inward, right on cue.

"--urk!" said Loki, as the Hulk slammed him into the one wall still standing -- and through it, into the next room.

Fury jumped to his feet. "What took you guys so long?!"

"Traffic was terrible," Tony quipped in Iron Man's voice, gliding gently to the floor, as Coulson snapped, "Clear!" and stepped forward to unlock Fury's cuffs.

"All the enemy agents are down, and the situation is contained, sir," said Coulson.

"Good," Fury said, "but your response time sucked monkey balls, people! Now, I'm only going to ask you one more time -- what the hell took you so long?!"

Silence.

Fury narrowed his eye and glared at them. Clint's face went carefully blank; Coulson looked slightly exasperated; Natasha looked bored; Steve was blushing and looking guilty; and Tony was smirking at him. Fury shook his head. "Seriously? You guys seriously delayed responding because you had a bet on? Do we need to have the lecture about unprofessional behavior -- again?"

Clint tried to look innocent, and failed. Steve looked guiltier. Tony's smirk just widened. Natasha, Phil, and Maria murmured, "Sorry, sir; won't happen again, sir."

"So, what was the bet?"

Steve stood to attention. "Well, sir, some people--" Tony smirked at Natasha and Thor "--thought you would do anything necessary to pull this off, including crying, while some people--" Clint ducked his head "--thought you'd only take it so far, and then, uh--" Steve broke off, blushing.

Clint grinned at him. "I thought you'd get pissed off with Loki, sir, and shoot him in the--"

"Clint, not in front of the ladies!" Steve snapped and nodded respectfully at Hill and Natasha. "Sorry, ma'am, Natasha."

Natasha rolled her eyes and Maria snorted.

"Well, anyway, sir," Steve continued, "the rest of the bet was about whether or not Loki would think it believable if you cried a single, crystalline tear."

Tony smirked harder and held out his gauntleted hand in a pay-up gesture to Thor. "Told you Fury could pull it off. You know, for a trickster god, your brother's just not that bright. Pay up, Shakespeare."

"I believe that's my money, gentlemen, ladies." Fury snatched the money out of Thor's hand. "Alright, all of the rest of you clowns -- pay up!" The team grumbled, but started reluctantly pulling out dollar bills. "Consider it a contribution to SHIELDs Widows & Orphans Fund, people, and a fine for doubting my abilities." He collected the money in. "Never doubt my abilities! Nobody else can cry a single crystalline tear like I can."

**Author's Note:**

> If you want to talk to me about this story, you can come over to the Single Crystalline Tear entries cross-posted [at my fic journal on DW](http://zelliehstories.dreamwidth.org/108831.html) | [at my personal DW](http://zellieh.dreamwidth.org/151736.html) | [or at my personal LJ](http://zellieh.livejournal.com/172573.html). I like constructive criticism, advice on how to improve my stories, meta discussions and general conversation, and simple squeeing about how lovely fandom is. If you just want to leave a comment or kudos here, that's fine too. No pressure! ::G::


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